Failure. A word that used to put mind - numbing fear in me. What if I fail? A question that rings louder than a Sunday gong at the Basilica. Over and over again.

We are on the final days of the year 2017. With it comes with a lot of reflecting, trying to see if the goals set for the year were met. If an area was improved or slacked on, was anything learnt? At the end of the day, growth is what counts. Looking back and thinking, well damn, I did learn something. Who you are today, right now, is the result of the numerous circumstances you've had to deal with.

If someone gave you mitt gloves and told you to execute calligraphy with a delicate ink brush, you would look at them as if they are crazy. How about dancing makarena infront of a crowd, or jumping of a cliff, aka bunge jumping? Or trying to speak in front of a large crowd of people, using a teleprompter in a different language. Madness? Why would I want to embarrass myself this way. That’s somewhat extreme however the feeling that gets to you is fear, because you are being set up to fail. Same feeling you feel when you quit your job to do what you've always wanted to do, or moving to a new place. We fear failure because we tend to think we will embarrass ourselves, or our family or just choke. That thought is enough to stay in your perfect little corner.Your comfort zone. And as they say, it is a great place but nothing ever grows there. That’s why this feeling of ennui sets in - same old thing just a different day. It becomes this foggy, hazy space - you feel you could, would, be doing more, but you are just there. Bored out of your mind.

Purpose and intention is a huge motivator for me. I addressed the why question on this post and I know this for sure. My purpose or intention keeps me aligned to my goal. It wakes me up, it drives me. I keeps me going when I feel frustrated and even mentally exhausted. We are here for such a limited time, wouldn’t you want to live out your best life. That which you were created for?

I have been listening to Super Soul Sunday on my subway rides and I always learn something. It's a an amazing podcast and whenever you get a chance. Great conversations with spiritual leaders and writers of our time Listen to it and be inspired.

So as we turn the chapter to another new year, may these last few days be full of eye opening, reflective and hopefully have lessons that will carry you to the new year.

Keep working, keep trying, fail forward. Keep heading up - or uptown.